Talent Wanted for "Harpoon" Feature Film

Elle's a freckled beauty with calm grace, masking her anxiety. She knows she's the smartest in any room, but that doesn't give her confidence. It only makes her more anxious. (Think of a serene swan on a lake, but beneath the surface its webbed feet are frantically kicking.) In any other slasher, she'd be the "final girl." In 'Poon, she dies too.

Brian's a nihilistic slacker hellbent on chaos who just wants to watch the world burn. He's read too many philosophy books, so his ethics are skewed beyond repair. No one's quicker with a one-liner, though. Brian's saving grace? He secretly harbors a deep and true love for Elle.

Build Athletic. Troy's an all-American alpha male - built like a QB and with a heart of gold - but that can't solve his ED issues. In fact, it only makes it worse. He's hung like a porn star, but can't get it up. It also doesn't help to be incessantly psychoanalyzed by his Freudian scholar girlfriend, McKenzie.

McKenzie's a brainiac who looks like a bubbly cheerleader. Think Tracy Flick after a college glow-up. She's a bombshell, or better yet, a ticking bomb. McKenzie's ambitious, motivated, and self-aware. She knows her faults (given her psych background) and is always working on self-improvement. The problem is she tries to fix everyone else too.

Jonah is socially awkward, pudgy, and the epitome of a PhD student who buries themself in obsession over niche subject matter rather than connecting with the real world. His best friend is his pet clownfish, Julius. The bane of his existence is Brian.

The angriest-looking man you ever saw in a swimsuit. He's tan and shirtless with a cowboy hat and boots, and shotgun in hand. He owns a small rental shack (boats, kayaks, etc.) and speaks with an odd Southwest hick/backwoods accent.