Performers Needed for Theatre Audition "Noises Off"

The director of a play-within-the-play, Nothing On. Temperamental, exacting and sarcastic. Involved with both Brooke and Poppy.

A middle-aged television star who is not only the top-billed star but also one of the play’s principal investors. Dating the much younger Garry.

The Cockney housekeeper for the Brents’ home. A hospitable, though slow-witted and slow-moving, chatterbox.

The play’s leading man, a solid actor who is completely incapable of finishing a sentence unless it is dialogue. Constantly stutters and ends sentences with “you know…” Dating Dotty and prone to jealousy.

An estate agent looking to let Flavia’s and Philip’s house.

A young, inexperienced actress from London. She pays no attention to others, either in performance or backstage, and persists in her role as scripted regardless of any interruption or mayhem. She is always losing her contact lenses, without which she is blind. Part of the Lloyd–Poppy–Brooke love triangle.

A girl Roger is attempting to seduce (or perhaps a girl trying to seduce Roger). Works for the tax authorities.

Has a serious fear of violence and blood, both of which give him nosebleeds. Well-meaning, but lacks confidence and is rather dim-witted.

Lives out of the country with his wife Flavia to avoid paying taxes and is on a secret visit. Sheikh: Interested in renting the house.

Cheerful and sensible, a reliable actress and the company’s de facto peacemaker. Something of a gossip, and a bit two-faced. Has a rather protective attitude towards Freddie.

Philip Brent’s wife. She is dependable, though not one for household duties.

An elderly, half-deaf “pro” with a long, storied career and a drinking problem. If he is not in sight while rehearsing, the stage crew must find him before he finds anything alcoholic.

An old man in his seventies, breaking into the Brents’ house.

Assistant Stage Manager and understudy to the female roles. Emotional, skittish and over-sensitive. Part of the Lloyd-Poppy-Brooke love triangle and, by act two, pregnant with Lloyd’s baby.

The over-worked and easily flustered Stage Manager, who must understudy, fix the set, and run Lloyd’s errands on top of his usual duties.